my thoughts...

have you ever sometimes felt how your life just fast forwards infront of your eyes, stopping only for an instant for those few significant moments in your life? At the end of the day, you felt so spent and wonder where have the days gone by. I came to this realization during the days when I was counting and wasting hours, minutes and seconds of my precious life doing nothing. Yes, I did waste my time in cyberspace. Have I made a huge difference in my life? In someone else's life? Well, could be.. maybe... I was helping girls via this female dominated forum giving love advices, financial advises and what-have-yous.. I just hope that I somehow made an impact in their lives. Another thing as well is how my husband really appreciates me for being.. domesticated.. Yeah, I wanted to be a good housewife even when sometimes our household doesn't like me that much. I made sure there's food in the table when the man of the house comes home. I made sure that every comfort is available to soothe his tired mind and body. I did try being a good daughter and sister as well as much as I can. But.. somehow.. I'm not satisfied.. I want something BIG!!! But then again... am I not making a BIG impact on the people I love? Our families.. my husband? Sometimes, I tend to oversee the answers that have always been there. Simple things, though, it may not be that huge compared with what others achieved but if I look at the other side of the coin, I maybe more than enough to those close to me.. to the people I love.

"I maybe insignificant to many.. but I can mean the WORLD to others too.."

True? I hope so...

on growing up...

I sometimes do reminisce the times when I was still a kid.  I just play around all day with my brothers and cousins playing Langit/Lupa and Monkey Monkey.  At the end of the day, we go home and have mud all over our bathroom whenever my mom asks us.. NO!.. order us to wash up before dinner time.  Dinner time consists always of fighting with my brothers over who should get the biggest pork slice from my mom's ever delicious sinigang na baboy with fish sauce and chili as condiments.  Later on, Dad, would try to sneak outside to scare the life out of our living day lights by pretending to be a ghost outside the window.  =)  Also, I always do fight with my brothers the harshest way possible but I still dearly love them.  Well, it's just a part of growing up.

I really, really miss those times.  I don't know...  I miss being young... I miss my family...  Not that I am not happy with hubby right now... but, probably, it's just something that I totally cherish and miss.  Life was simple back then. Those were really the moments when I was truly happy.  But as they say, the only constant thing in this world is change.  Time changes everything.  Youth passes and beauty fades.  Your grow up, get married and start a family of your own.  The cycle of life continues.  You create new colorful memories but the old beautiful memories never, ever fades away.  It will be forever in your heart.

You know what they say when you are about to die?  Well, they say that in the last few moments of your life here on earth, a series of significant memories will begin flashing right in front of your eyes.  Just like an old movie.  I know when that time comes, I will smile and say to myself... it was a life well spent... that will do.

back to regular programming...

I'm back!!! After sooo many days of no update, I'm back!   I have been busy with my last few days at Big Blue trying to close some things with a project I was handling.  Plus, to add, typhoons coming into the Philippines kept me, I mean 'us', busy with all the cleaning, etc.

Hopefully, you'll see more updates from me moving forward...  Watch out for it! =)

Happy Anniversary =) !

mixed emotions

As the countdown for my hubby's arrival begins, i can feel both excitement and anxiety. I miss my hubby soooo much. It has been almost 3 months since we last saw each other. Yes, we do have our daily webcam chats but feeling his physical presence is way, waaaaay different =( .

He's going to be here in November and will stay for only 3 weeks. After that, he's back to his overseas assignment. Sigh... Not that I'm complaining. His overseas assignment opened up a lot of opportunities for us. For him, a chance to hone his professional skills and for us, well, a chance to save, financially. It got a lot of perks too. Even though he's on overseas assignment for 2 yrs, he has a chance to go home here every 6 months. Come to think of it? I can come with him but we both understand that the place he's at now is not really that "female" friendly.

By October, I'm going to be separated from Big Blue. Hubby and I agreed that I'll rest for awhile after my stint at Big Blue. It's actually a perfect chance for us to focus in 'making' a family. Now! THAT is why I'm feeling anxious and pressured at the same time. November is actually pretty close and I'm NERVOUS. I don't know why but I feel pressured =(. What if our wishes doesn't happen yet? Now what? Wait for another 6 months? Boredom is gonna kill me; well, actually, my wallet will get a bad beating (read previous posts). Kidding aside, I really, really feel the pressure creeping in...

Lights Out at the Big Blue

Things have been happening pretty fast at the Big Blue. We just had our Lights Out Celebration last Friday. Of course, I shed tears seeing the last video showing up in the screen. Well, come to think of it, Friday was the day of the many lasts.. Did i make sense? =) Hmm.. it was the last group celebration I have attended for the company I worked for for 6+ years... last day I went home late from the office.. last night I saw our company logo brightly lit against the darkness of the night.. last time I was in the rec hall... so, many last times! =( I am positive though that it's not going to be the last time I will be seeing my friends from the Big Blue =) .

I admit though that I still feel sadness even though the closure announcement has been done almost 1 and a half years ago. That long?? Yah, we knew before then that we will be separated from Big Blue. It was really a blessing that we lasted this long. Again, we're still lucky =).

still alive and kicking..

i have been so busy lately after hubby left last May. Things started to pick up with the last project am handling prior my separation with the Big Blue which took up most of my time... err, aside from Resto City in Facebook and reading posts in GT. I spend most of my time in the gym too trying to lose the 4 pounds I gained when hubby was here. Slowly but surely, am getting back in shape. I'm losing inches but my weight still stays the same and this has been depressing me alot. =( Oh well! i guess I need to wait, besides, it's only been 2 mos since I started exercising, with 3 weeks rest in between. =)

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The rainy season is officially here. The weather has been gloomy for almost a week now. Expect to see growing cases of different kinds of diseases like the H1N1, etc. They spread like wildfire during the cold and rainy season. =(

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Now i'm busy with Artscow. Their 4x6 prints costs only $0.06 (Php 3.00) each which is by the way, 50% cheaper than local prints! I've been uploading tons of pictures since this morning. =)

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Have you ever felt you're at the crossroad of your professional career? Admittedly, I am and this got me confused and still is confusing me.. I pray that I chose the path that God lays down for me.

thought for the day

"There's a certain high in feeling that I am improving day after day. It gives me the strength to continue.

I am on the road to recovery."


-- Apple --

Abundance INSIDE

Ok, so, I started off work again last week. There were several training offerings last week but unfortunately, I wasn't able to attend anything since I need to catch up on work! =( Thankfully, I still had the pleasure of attending Pido's life seminar. I really had a wonderful time! =)

Here are some quotable quotes I jotted down.

"I am the master of my emotions."

"You choose what you feel."

"Let go to move forward."

"A SMILE fights off negative feelings."

"I am bigger than my problems."

"Let GO and let GOD."

"Focus on the present."

"There's ALWAYS something to be thankful for."

"A thankful heart is a happy heart."

"Lilipas din yan."

"Nothing is negative."

"Everything happens for your own growth."

"Tears are gifts."

"In HIS time."