updates...

Am itching to go back to work na.. at the same time, i'm soooooo tamad to do anything at all but stay in front of the computer. haaayy!

anyway, i was fixing my things last night and i saw the ultrasound images of our baby. wala lang! i suddenly went bawling over the images. The song "Lead me Lord" suddenly played in my mind. I desperately asked for God's guidance. I knew what happened was God's way of saying that THERE IS A PERFECT PLAN for each one of us. I am getting there. I just sooo wish I get to see and realize the PERFECT PLAN soon! I understand what happened but there are lapses, yes, there are times when I still question WHY? over and over again. Why can't I nurture a life inside me? Why are there people getting kids who doesn't deserve them at all? Why are there people who resorts to killing their babies just because they are unwanted/accidents? In my mind, there may be reasons. Yes, the means can be inhumane but GOD reveals his PLAN in HIS own perfect time thru these situations. Now, my heart is telling me to TRUST in HIM. And by that, I believe in HIM.

I need to move forward. No need to dwell on the past. Now, I've been making plans on ensuring how my next pregnancy will be successful. I need to conquer PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) by having a healthy lifestyle (lose weight, exercise and eat healthy). Aside from that, I may probably be staying-at-home after my stint @ the BIG BLUE to de-stress. =) Now, THAT I'm reaaalllyyy looking forward to. =)